Cover your fucking nose when you sneeze! Right, I'm talking to you! Also, water doesn't kill germs; soap does. Swine flu comes from the pigs who don't wash. So wash your fucking hands with soap and warm water after you use the toilet! Awright? Sheesh. How many times do I have to tell you people?


Sneezing In Ultra Slow Motion - Watch more Funny Videos

Ok. I'm fine now. Sorry I got so upset.

Via ak2co

And while we're on the subject, here's a cover of YMCA in Cantonese.

They are beta-testing a new app called Songsmith. It allows you create songs by singing into your laptop. Here's the into video:




Ok. How do we approach this?
1) A travesty that will reduce the art of songwriting to computerized drivel that any tone deaf 8-year-old can do, provide another reason to stop talking to each other, and destroy the fabric of society.
2) A cool new tool for culture hacking, similar to Dictionaraoke

I choose option 2. To wit:

Courtesy of Joe Nicolosi, a description of the three Star Wars movies by his friend Amanda.

Think you can judge a movie by its trailer?

Words has it that Mozart started composing on skates before he discovered the pianoforte.

I've seen this a couple of hundred times and he never hits him. It's clear he didn't spend enough time out at the shoe range. What a loafer.

Like us, you search out anything related to the SNL cowbell sketch. We just found a site that allows you to upload an MP3 and add more cowbell and Christopher Walken clips. Stupid and fun.

When is a dog not a dog? When it's a robot.

We adopted a dog a couple of days ago. We drove to the animal shelter in Englewood. It was a horrific experience, by the way. It's the kind of place they use to film the "oh, won't you adopt these sorry animals" commercials. Poop everywhere. Nothing but concrete, chain link fences, and sick animals. We found a pure bred Boston Terrier who charmed our pants off. Without pants, we had no choice but to grab her and whisk her back to Boulder, the land of yard sign recycling and organic dog food. We quickly named her Robot, in honor of robots. The vet said, "You lucked out. She's a $1,200 dog!" We hit the jackpot! After two days of Robot, we quickly realized that, even at $1,200, she was a bargain. She's very sweet. She will lick the face of anyone in her path for a half hour. She hasn't barked yet. She knows how to play Parcheesi.

Thanks to the shelter:
Eye infection
Vaginitis
Intestinal infection
Kennel cough

Two types of antibiotics, an eye medicine, and a plastic cone should do the trick.